Reading
instead of a psychologist: what stories will relieve the child of the complexes
and fears
Ach
mom knows the best way to put a child to sleep, soothe, amuse or interest - to
read him a story. At
the same time, not all parents are aware of that fairy stories can serve as not
only a sleeping pill and "antidepressant", but also a psychologist. With
the proper tale will "cure" a child of shyness or, for example, to
understand the reasons for his bad behavior.
Despite
the fact that people invent fairy stories for thousands of years,
skazkoterapiya as a separate area in psychology is a relatively new - at the
end of the last century. Like
many other know-how, the method originally used to work with
"special" children (autistic, hyperactive, etc.). The
results were stunning: psychologists using psychotherapy were able to achieve
significant improvements in the sick children. If
the method works for children with complex psychological problems, with the
whims and fears of your crumbs can handle even more.
Fairytale
- in fact, the manipulation of magical story that the child should not just
listen to or read, and to alter, add to their own way, to role play to explain
the reasons for the behavior of a character. Due
to the fact that the baby will endow the experiences of fairy tale characters,
the light will get out all his grievances and complexes, which until now were
hiding in the secret corners of the soul. Realizing
exactly what rankles, excites and frustrates the child, it will be much easier
to find a common language with him, to help him solve the problem.
To
apply psychotherapy in practice, you do not need a degree of
professional psychologist. Just
think back to your favorite fairy tale with a child, and then ask him to tell
it again. Be
careful not to interrupt, but do not forget to ask clarifying questions. In the course
of your conversation may reveal a lot of interesting things. For
example, it appears that the Gray Wolf from "Little Red Riding Hood"
was angry because the girl and her grandmother did not want to be friends with
him and he felt lonely. Most
likely, your tomboy and often fights on the playground at all because of bad
temper - just other kids for some reason do not call it into your game. A
princess Nesmeyana crying from morning to night, because her mom and dad all
the time fighting. In
this case, a sad princess - your daughter, and her parents - you and your
husband. Apparently,
your relationship is concerned about a child is much stronger than you thought.
He
felt the problem, proceed to deal with it. Try
to find out the crumbs that might improve the situation and to please the
princess or how to help the Grey Wolf. But
in any case, do not push the child to answer that seems right to you.
Tinkering
on your own fairy tale, kid chooses an option that is most appropriate to its
internal state. And
it will be an answer that will not only give you the key to solving the
problem, but also allows the child to be free from internal stresses.
Be
careful! If
the child overrides a good end to a bad fairy, makes a good hero too cruel and
vindictive, or writing a story focuses on aggression and violence scenes -
should see a psychologist. In
serious cases, psycho-correction, even fabulous, must deal with a professional.
Spell of fears
However,
redoing the famous stories - not only welcome psychotherapy. If
you have been aware of a problem your child, pick up, or even compose
themselves magical story, reminiscent of the best of his situation. If
a child is shy and is experiencing due to the lack of, let the hero will show
your child how to make friends, and if the child is afraid of the dark, tell us
about your character coped with this phobia. Come
up with a magical spell that helped the hero to overcome fear. Armed
with this wonderful plot, next time, when the lights go out, your baby will be
more relaxed and confident in themselves and their abilities.
And do
not interfere with the child to dream. Parents
are often blamed their children for excessive writing. Some even categorically
prohibit "this nonsense." Do not rush
adjacent to the ranks of such serious dads and moms. Psychologists
say that children's fantasy - a real "self-therapy." Coming
up with stories, the child pronounces his concerns and trying to find the
answers. After
all the stories that compose your baby, do not only reflect his inner world,
but also contribute to his personal development, learn to cope with life's
challenges.
Do not
forget that any fairy tale you read to your child, be positive and good
finishes. Try
to avoid, fantasy stories like "The Lord of the Rings" Tolkien. Despite
the fact that good triumphs over evil, they are too many dark, negative
characters - even the sunniest toddler may lose orientation, if it in abundance
will fall endless battle eerie monsters.
Princess? The
Princess!
If any
of your female friends says that as a child she never changed her clothes
princess or fairy - indeed, a friend disingenuous. However,
like many reputable Pope condemning the offspring of
"chingachgukskie" feathers in the head or "betmenskie 'wings. All
children love to try on different roles and put on a fabulous costumes. In
addition to the fun of this game, you can benefit greatly. If,
for example, you're a mom shy, insecure girl - let it be a great queen. Bring
beauty to the mirror and you will see how straighten her shoulders and change
gait! A
restless Skoda and brats will be helpful to feel like a knight, responsible for
saving the world.
Find a
kid with a big box and make of it a magic chest. It
can be filled with the contents of my grandmother's wardrobe: colorful scarves,
feathers and intricate berets. Invite
your child to gradually get out of there, these "accessories" and try
on. Ask
your child to tell about the character, in which he is reincarnated, what he
likes to make friends with anyone, if he was happy, and maybe in need have helped?
-
Your task is to gather as much information about the fictional hero, because he
- a direct reflection of the personality of your child. Being
in the image on the one hand, the kid can throw out the repressed emotions and
desires, and on the other - to lose different behaviors that will help him in
communicating with their peers.
By the
way, dressing up and help you. Transformed
into a witch, a queen or lady jungle, you can bring to life your rambunctious
child - the child accepts the terms of the game and will be happy to perform
the data you "important assignments."
Using
his 'royal' power, it will be easier to persuade fidget toys or collect, for
example, lay a bed.
Expert Opinion
By
selecting a story to read at night, avoid the sad and gloomy themes - positive
in the stories should always be greater than the negative. Light fairy tales -
the best evening option. If
you read some great work and fails partway to continue tomorrow, do it in a
neutral or good note. If
you leave a baby in a crib, closed the book on a negative thing (for example,
Prince Ivan was killed, and the Gray Wolf has not brought the water of life),
neisklyucheno that the child will be on their toes all night and cannot sleep.
All in good time
3 Years: The Three Little Pigs
In
children 3-4 years of close and interesting tales about animals, no matter what
it is - poetry Chukovskogo or the unforgettable "The Three Little
Pigs."
4.5 Years: Winnie the Pooh
With
4.5, the children have great fun listening to stories about the interaction of
animals and humans. Ivan
Tsarevich and the Grey Wolf, Christopher Robin and Winnie the Pooh - ideal!
5 Years: Cinderella
From
5-6 years old kid identifies himself with the human characters are: the boys -
with the Knights, the girls - with the princesses. These
characters you can find in fairy tales by Charles Perrault and Andersen.
7 Years: Think of yourself
In 6-7
years, the child begins to invent their own fairy-tale characters and, of
course, talk about them to others. By
the way, so were born the famous horror stories about the "coffin on
wheels". Upon
hearing of his child another horrible story, do not try to retrieve the head of
psychologists argue that their frightening stories of others, the child
"is considering" their fears.
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